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Back in the naughties, when the idea was novel, speed dating events attracted large diverse crowds.Up for a laugh, people embraced the novelty, and tried it.
And that is not being sat in a crappy bar, on the quietest night of the week, being forced to talk to 20 women.
And so you often end up with a load of attractive, sociable women, talking to more awkward, a-sociable men, who they would never normally speak to. The guys (who most often turn up awkwardly on their own) are out of their depth, and the women end up disappointed.
I’ve seen women walk out of speed dating events before they even start.
And organising something that doesn’t feel like an interview – an activity where you engage with others more naturally. If not, then don’t go – go to something he or she finds fun instead.
Ice-breakers are useful, but you want to be sideways on and doing something which you can chat about, not forced to sit face to face in clinical booths, literally judging each other on a slip of paper. If you have a certain ‘type’, then look at your friends, and find the friend who most resembles that type of person. Yes, speed dating can work – but only if you’re the type of person who NEEDS a bell and a tick sheet to talk to a stranger for 4 minutes (but won’t get intimidated by the situation).
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But, more often than not, they tell me that "no one is nearby".